3 appliances I didn't think I needed, until I did

1. Electric Can Opener. My parents shipped me one of these sophomore year of college in a care package, to the endless delight of my PBS-educated roommates. "What is this thing? How does it work?" they would squeal, afraid to touch anything lest they chop off a finger. Unable to operate it, they mocked me endlessly as they used their bohemian manual can openers. Finally last year, when I moved 400 miles away in a Ford Escort and tiny U-Haul trailer, I got rid of the can opener, vowing to simplify my life and kitchen. And now, to my dismay, I find that I cannot operate a manual can opener to save my life. My current roommate and I have gone through 3 can openers, each of them utterly failing to incise a can all the way around. But I swear, it's not my fault.

2. Blender. My grandmother bought me a blender for Christmas last year, and in the succeeding 6 months I used it all of once to make a soup. It, too, became a casualty in the Great Minimalization of 2009, and now I find myself needing a blender all the time.

3. Portable Steam Press. Who even knows what one of these is for? It went unopened for months, then unsold in my apartment yard sale, then off to the donation boxes. Of course this week I bought 2 silk shirts that practically TRY to get wrinkled and, according to their tags, SHOULD NOT BE IRONED. Curses on the urchin who now wields my portable steam press! Fortunately, I found, hotboxing the shirts in the bathroom after a shower seems to work just as well.

3 1/2. Quesadilla Maker. This one doesn't really count because I have always fully realized the value of a quesadilla maker, and was devastated when it broke into a million pieces on my cheap laminate kitchen floor.

Nothing like a recession to make you appreciate seemingly useless appliances. My friend Shoshana used to joke that Protestants always bought each other ponies and woks for Christmas. If you'd like to buy me a wok this year, Shoshi, I will vow to use it every day for the rest of my life.